Bye-Bye Disney, Hello Binge Guilt

It’s taken me a while to get to this final day of my untracked vacation. I’ve been avoiding it because I did not want to relive the moments of anxiety and guilt I experienced on this day.

If you’re just now joining me, check out day 1 and day 2.

We had early reservations for a character breakfast at ‘Ohana. This is probably one of my favorite character breakfasts because you get to meet Lilo and Stitch!

Since character breakfasts are a pretty unique experience, I decided to forgo my usual intermittent fasting routine for the day.

The breakfast is served family style. You get a basket of sweet breads and fresh fruit upon arriving. The server also brought out coffee and P.O.G. (passion fruit, orange and guava) juice.

Then they bring out a skillet with biscuits, bacon, sausage, eggs, potatoes, and waffles. You just kind of grab what you want, and they bring more out as needed.

Look at the Stitch waffle.

So this is what I ate. Except here’s the thing. I probably could’ve stopped at like one plate of the skillet food. But I didn’t. I had seconds of everything in that bottom right picture, and I felt kind of crazy doing it.

I think I went into a binge mode because I knew this was the last day I’d be untracked. I figured might as well go all out since I didn’t have to face the macros for one last day.

I did enjoy myself though, and I loved getting to see Stitch 🙂 

We had some time to kill before our flights home, so we went to Disney Springs after breakfast to do some shopping.

I stopped at Goofy’s Candy Company to get one last apple to take home with me. At Goofy’s, you can create your own apple and I kind of went all out:

HNNNNNGGGG

I decided to save this to eat when I got home later that night.

After Disney Springs, we needed to go back to our resort to catch our shuttle to the airport. We got to the airport around 2:30PM, and I was surprisingly hungry even though I had eaten a huge breakfast only like five hours before.

This was my lunch…

Sbarro Classic Italian Sausage and Peppers

Caramel Pecanbon from Cinnabon

I ate this slice of pizza and then wanted something sweet. So I got this ridiculous cinnamon roll. I did share it with my friends so I didn’t eat the entire thing, but I felt super anxious after eating it. I knew that my meals this day were loaded with carbs and fats. I was angry with myself for not choosing something more balanced like a big salad. I got a little teary-eyed wishing that I could reverse my choices and start over.

This moment here is why I am so thankful I have a coach who understands the importance of balancing fitness and life. I contacted my coach immediately to let her know that I was feeling anxious and bingey. I confessed my terrible day to her.

Here’s what she asked:

Did you have fun?

I had forgotten that the point of this vacation was to have fun, not to worry about my intake. And really, I did have fun. This moment of guilt was brought on by the sadness that comes with a vacation coming to a close.

As soon as I got home from the airport, I went to the gym. Not because I thought it would “reverse” my vacation eating, but because I knew the physical activity would calm my nerves. I had a great workout from all those extra calories, and my pump was ridiculous 🙂

And yes, I still had that caramel apple as my post workout meal!

The next day I took progress pics and measurements to check in with my coach.

Here’s my pre-vaca and post-vaca pics:

…No weight change.

After all of that! I couldn’t believe it. This just goes to show that a couple of days off is not going to do any significant damage. Part of me actually felt cheated that I didn’t make any gains after eating all that and working out the night before!

As usual, here’s my wins and opportunities:

Win: The realization that I could essentially have three days off and not gain 239048 lbs was exactly what I needed to move forward toward overcoming food anxiety. Now I can take untracked meals and not worry about what it might do to my physique. Now I can feel more comfortable estimating macros when going out because even if I’m off, I’m not going to blow up from it.

Win: Communicating with my coach about my binge guilt. Sometimes people want to avoid their coaches when they fall off, but I knew that I could count on her to talk me down.

Win: Putting my anxieties to rest with a workout. The self-esteem boost I got from that strong workout was powerful enough to dismiss the self-depreciation I was experiencing from earlier.

Opportunity: The next time I go on vacation, I will probably choose to go with more balanced food and allow myself one kind of “treat” instead of just eating whatever. I feel better eating nutrient-dense food.

Your macronutrient ratio is not THE bare necessity of life. I’d consider a healthy lifestyle to be a bare necessity for me, but so is having fun and making memories.

When you forget about your worries and your strife, you’ll find that life is much more enjoyable.

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5 thoughts on “Bye-Bye Disney, Hello Binge Guilt

  1. Pingback: Dining Out Challenges Dump | Quarter-Life Cassidy

  2. Pingback: DIY Caramel Apple | Quarter-Life Cassidy

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