It’s taken me a while to get to this final day of my untracked vacation. I’ve been avoiding it because I did not want to relive the moments of anxiety and guilt I experienced on this day.
We had early reservations for a character breakfast at ‘Ohana. This is probably one of my favorite character breakfasts because you get to meet Lilo and Stitch!
Since character breakfasts are a pretty unique experience, I decided to forgo my usual intermittent fasting routine for the day.
The breakfast is served family style. You get a basket of sweet breads and fresh fruit upon arriving. The server also brought out coffee and P.O.G. (passion fruit, orange and guava) juice.
Then they bring out a skillet with biscuits, bacon, sausage, eggs, potatoes, and waffles. You just kind of grab what you want, and they bring more out as needed.
So this is what I ate. Except here’s the thing. I probably could’ve stopped at like one plate of the skillet food. But I didn’t. I had seconds of everything in that bottom right picture, and I felt kind of crazy doing it.
I think I went into a binge mode because I knew this was the last day I’d be untracked. I figured might as well go all out since I didn’t have to face the macros for one last day.
I did enjoy myself though, and I loved getting to see Stitch 🙂
We had some time to kill before our flights home, so we went to Disney Springs after breakfast to do some shopping.
I stopped at Goofy’s Candy Company to get one last apple to take home with me. At Goofy’s, you can create your own apple and I kind of went all out:
I decided to save this to eat when I got home later that night.
After Disney Springs, we needed to go back to our resort to catch our shuttle to the airport. We got to the airport around 2:30PM, and I was surprisingly hungry even though I had eaten a huge breakfast only like five hours before.
This was my lunch…
I ate this slice of pizza and then wanted something sweet. So I got this ridiculous cinnamon roll. I did share it with my friends so I didn’t eat the entire thing, but I felt super anxious after eating it. I knew that my meals this day were loaded with carbs and fats. I was angry with myself for not choosing something more balanced like a big salad. I got a little teary-eyed wishing that I could reverse my choices and start over.
This moment here is why I am so thankful I have a coach who understands the importance of balancing fitness and life. I contacted my coach immediately to let her know that I was feeling anxious and bingey. I confessed my terrible day to her.
Here’s what she asked:
Did you have fun?
I had forgotten that the point of this vacation was to have fun, not to worry about my intake. And really, I did have fun. This moment of guilt was brought on by the sadness that comes with a vacation coming to a close.
As soon as I got home from the airport, I went to the gym. Not because I thought it would “reverse” my vacation eating, but because I knew the physical activity would calm my nerves. I had a great workout from all those extra calories, and my pump was ridiculous 🙂
And yes, I still had that caramel apple as my post workout meal!
The next day I took progress pics and measurements to check in with my coach.
Here’s my pre-vaca and post-vaca pics:
…No weight change.
After all of that! I couldn’t believe it. This just goes to show that a couple of days off is not going to do any significant damage. Part of me actually felt cheated that I didn’t make any gains after eating all that and working out the night before!
As usual, here’s my wins and opportunities:
Win: The realization that I could essentially have three days off and not gain 239048 lbs was exactly what I needed to move forward toward overcoming food anxiety. Now I can take untracked meals and not worry about what it might do to my physique. Now I can feel more comfortable estimating macros when going out because even if I’m off, I’m not going to blow up from it.
Win: Communicating with my coach about my binge guilt. Sometimes people want to avoid their coaches when they fall off, but I knew that I could count on her to talk me down.
Win: Putting my anxieties to rest with a workout. The self-esteem boost I got from that strong workout was powerful enough to dismiss the self-depreciation I was experiencing from earlier.
Opportunity: The next time I go on vacation, I will probably choose to go with more balanced food and allow myself one kind of “treat” instead of just eating whatever. I feel better eating nutrient-dense food.
Your macronutrient ratio is not THE bare necessity of life. I’d consider a healthy lifestyle to be a bare necessity for me, but so is having fun and making memories.